Saturday, January 15, 2005

Now this is fuckin' intriguing! What do you think about this?

It's highly fascinating that we see ourselves every day and have little to no clue what we look like right underneath our skin. I think this is an amazing display and will probably go to Chicago and see it some time soon (unless they decide to bring it to NYC).

I would love to discuss various thoughts on this display wth anyone who has seen it OR is as intrigued as I am.

80)

My wife got an egg on a roll for breakfast this morning and there was a fuckin' GREEN PEPPER piece hidden!

She and I both equally hate green peppers with a passionate disgust. I saw the nauseation on her face and realized immediately it must be a GREEN PEPPER!

Kill GREEN PEPPERS I say!

Slay them like DRAGONS!

Obliterate the GREEN PEPPER!

Death to the GREEN PEPPER!

Friday, January 14, 2005

This is so fuckin' cool :) New photos from Saturn, Yeehaw!

I am a firm believer that life as we know it exists elsewhere! Hopefully in our lifetimes we can meet some E. T. creatures/beings. Take them to Walmart etc.

I just got an ACKNOWLEDGEMENT notice from these fuckin' idiots - Board of Elections - City of New York.

I open it up and the first thing I see is REPUBLICAN checked off! I called immediately, got to speak with 4 people and listened to 6 renditions of "THANK YOU FOR CALLING THE CITY OF NEW YORK" complete with nauseating background music before the right person finally came to the phone.

I am assuming I also voted for Bush then. I do not know but something sounds FISHY! What complete incompetance OR maybe the BUSH clan has some scams going on. I wonder...

Cornelia and Nonu Dragoman of Transylvania welcome the birth of their new bouncing baby boy. His name is:

YAHOO!

Not sure if it's better then Apple or Phinneaus.

What do you think is the strangest or coolest name you have heard?

I have 1 that comes to mind immediately:

1. Lar-kiki-shamona

Discuss!

SHARK BAIT - WOO HA HA!

Just because it was in my head for a minute!

Thursday, January 13, 2005

How the fuck do you eat a whole fucking bowl of this GNOCCHI?

I can eat MAYBE 30% of 1 piece of Gnocchi in a single sitting. It's like eating the fucking wall. Plaster of paris meets a potato noodley substance. Its like soft, mooshy, somehow edible potato pasta pillows with sauce of your choice!

Who likes GNOCCHI?

Explain why you like this fascinating food and how you do not feel it is monotonous in your mouth. Just imagine if the sauce that accompanies your pasty pasta poop is not tasty. Then your eating paste vehicles for a sauce that sucks. What a waste, go have some lasagne goddamnit (in a jewish grandfather voice).

Looking forward to hearing THESE replies.

Wednesday, January 12, 2005

Who are your favorite 10 all time television characters of all time?

Please use numerical order starting from 10 and going down to 1.

Here is my personal list! If I forgot anyone, I'll simply add them in later :)

10. Mister Furley - Three's Company

Anyone up for PERQUACKEY?

9. Maxwell Q. Klinger - M*A*S*H

Oh, I don't want no more a army life, gee mom I wanna go home!

8. Colonel Sherman T. Potter - M*A*S*H

MULE FRITTERS!

7. Reverend Jim - TAXI - tied with Al Bundy - Married With Children

HEY BOSS!

FAMILY MEETING!

6. Fire Marshall Bill - Jim Carrey - In Living Color

LEMME TELL YA SUMTHIN!

5. Charles Emerson Winchester, III - M*A*S*H

Please, try not to be ab-zerd

4. Ed Norton/Ralph Kramden - The Honeymooners

BANG, ZOOM

3. Hawkeye - Captain Benjamin Franklin Pierce - M*A*S*H

ADAM's RIBS

2. Stewie - The Family Guy

BLAST!

1. Larry David - Curb Your Enthusiasm

You my caucasian


Tuesday, January 11, 2005

BEGIN......STOP!!!......JUDGE......RED!!!

I have this machine in my office. I am thinking of getting a MAME machine one day. I do think it would kick ass to have a true mini arcade inside a roller rink one day.

Shitty pizza and quarter games was the life.

If only the world was that simple.

I think one day in a certain part of the U.S.A., where I open this establishment, it could be that simple again.

At least whilst inside the roller rink

and

whilst inside the screen

and joystick of the video game we could all be in that special place of freedom.

Not sure yet how I will do it, but I am a firm believer in enjoying life, playing games and being competitive.

This said, let there be a place on earth filled with love, puppies, non stop games and fattening foods. There is little GOOD, HAPPY news anymore. I flipped through the channels during each newscast @ 10 and 11pm over the last few weeks just to watch the entire airing. I noticed channel 9 - the worst channel for anything in my opinion, had a GOOD NEWS segment. Quite nonsensical, but at least they offered some portion of the viewing with a positive sounding story. Maybe they made it up. Maybe there is no good news to report. Maybe its all terrorism and death.

Maybe we are a thought in a greater beings mind or palm.

Snicker.


one, two-hooooo, tha-reeee!

3 licks.

Anyone ever run out of jeans because they were all dirty?

I had to wear the NIKE tennis pants all day becasue work was so hectic I didn't have time to put the laundry in. Of course it only takes about 18 seconds to get the jeans in the laundry, 5 seconds to pour the liquid detergent and 2 seconds to turn the switch on. But none-the-less I didn't have time so here I sit in NIKE tennis pants typing this.

First person to name this movie gets a kiss of some sort via email.

Lionheart is on the AMC American Movie Classics Network

Let me tell you how this is laughable...Actually, if you know the movie you are probably laughing hysterically, keeled over, gagging on what was left of your chicken wing/bone.

AMERICAN MOVIE CLASSIC me arse!

Anyone ever see this nonsense?

I'd like to have hung out with Jim Morrison one day. Anyone here ever go to see a live doors concert?

Tell me about your experience.

http://www.thedoors.com/band/jim/grave/

Ive added photos to all captions that I felt needed a photo. Click on them for your viewing pleasure.

Thanks!

I can't wait for the new season of Curb Your Enthusiasm :)

That show should be on 3 days a week with all new episodes all the time. The cast and crew should live and breathe ONLY making this show all of the waking hours of their lives.

Can a 4 year old German girl really have a number 1 song? YEP!

It's about a fuckin' CROCODILE no less!

The hottest thing in German music right now is a 4-year-old girl's made-up song about a crocodile.
Joy Gruttman's song, "Snappy the Little Crocodile" ("Schnappi, das kleine Krokodil"), is the No. 1 song on the German charts. Her family posted the song on a Web site as a joke, but a radio station in Cologne, Germany, got hold of it and made it a hit.

Gruttman is the youngest recording artist to make it to the German Top 10, let alone No. 1.
"Snappy" beat out songs by Kylie Minogue and Linkin Park. The song is even appearing as remixes in German dance clubs.

http://213.158.118.36/schnappi/

I love our world :)

Played a shitload of board games tonight!

We decided to go to toys r us and buy OUTBURST but they were fresh OUT. SO:

We bought BEYOND BALDERDASH which fucking rocks and we bought a 3 pack of games including concentration which was piss poor, family feud which we did not attempt yet and THE NEWLYWED GAME without Bob Eubanks!

Was high quality excitement for all participants.

GAMES !

Monday, January 10, 2005

It's like a warm stick a buttah!

This always cracks me up :)

What is your favorite Saturday night live skit and WHY?


I wish there was an invisible bathroom right next to my bed for the mornings when I do not want to wake up "just yet."

Its 9:03 AM, my left arm is asleep from being tucked in underneath my body all night. The inside of my mouth feels like 6 prunes shriveled up and were left for dead there and finally the urine in my bladder has expanded my lower belloy region to the point where I look to be in my 2nd trimester!

Its time to get it all out, so I get up...BUT if there was a button I could push that would bring a bathroom to my instantly and take care of my needs whilst I still am laying down somehow... THAT would be the answer to my supreme happiness.

:)

Sunday, January 09, 2005

Does anybody know how I can set up the USER STATS?

right now it says "N/A" - i don't know why! its drivin' me fuckin' nuts! :)

Also is there any simple way to track all of the posts I make on other blogger.com pages?

Is there specific html to input? I checked out the help files and didn't see much help. I would like to track all the posts and be updated of activity on anything that I have posted to.

I welcome assistance! Resistance is futile!

Thanks ya!


Just went to the best food shopping place of my lifetime. FUCKIN' WEGMANS in Woodbridge, New Jersey!

Let me explain why this place rocked my food shopping world.

I live in Brooklyn, NY. The food shopping establishments here and the surrounding areas are laughable to a place like WEGMANS. @ WEGMANS everything you need is within the friendly confines of the 1 mile long store. I honestly needed 2 bathroom breaks and a bottle of water to make it through half of the store! Then, my back kept hurting due to the 4 hour long trek around this sustenance wonder of the world. I would bend over periodically on various aisles to ensure the fluid in my spinal joints kept lubricating properly. It worked well and I stood my ground whilst pushing that cart back and forth and up and down. We are debating moving to New Jersey just to be closer to WEGMANS!

Before WEGMANS my wife and I went to the mall and especially Fortunoff's which has FLATWARE. An abundance of FLATWARE. We looked around for awhile, tested different pieces and the finally settled on the ONEIDA silver with the 25 year warranty. That is an important warranty to have in life! Imagine if in March of 2027 one of the knives fall apart! I can easily open my filing cabinet and turn to WARRANTY section, dust it off and bring it in for a SHINY new, CANDYLIKE knife, on the house!

COOL!

Anyone else addicted to Corn Chex?

I must eat a box a week!

If I do not eat when I first wake up (within 15 minutes) I...

Get this feeling. This nauseating feeling.

Then, I eat.

And It's Fuckin' Gone.

Now onto the day 8o)

When you assume you:

Make and ASS out of U and ME